Beauty Disasters

Lest anyone should ever think that I know a lot about beauty (not that I think anyone actually thinks that), I think I should tell you that historically and currently, I do not.

I've always admired those girls and women who seem to radiate with natural perfection every day. They show up to all these early-morning events (school, work) with their perfectly styled hair, their flawless skin, bagless eyes, and perfectly trimmed/waxed eyebrows.

How do they do it?! This is a history of me trying to figure out this whole make-up and hair thing:

Baby to toddler: Cute little self with precious, soft hair.

Kindergarten: Started "painting" nails (really this was just me globbing a bunch of fingernail polish onto my fingertips and nails). This is also the time when my bangs started way at the top of my head and were cut in a blunt line at my eyebrows. Sometimes this look is cute on girls and women, but it looked really awkward and strange on me.

First & second grade: Still had the power bangs which my mom sometimes curled for church. I occasionally tried growing out my bangs which resulted in lots of pictures with my overgrown bangs covering my eyes.

Third grade: Decided to stick with the bangs, rather than growing them out.

Fourth grade: Grew out the bangs, but kept them that way. I liked to part my hair right down the middle. I'm guessing that people with really pointy, oval faces like mine shouldn't part their hair right down the middle. This wasn't a good look for me.

Fifth grade: I learned how to put my hair in a ponytail. So I did. Every day. First it started out parted right down the middle and drawn in a tight ponytail with a scrunchy at the base of my head. Then about halfway through fifth grade, I started pulling my hair into a slicked straight back ponytail or half ponytail. The tighter the better!

Sixth grade: I started noticing that my legs were really hairy and my eyebrows were really bushy. This was a source of self-consciousness for me so one day I asked my mom if I could shave my legs. She said, "sure," so I marched right into the bathroom to take a shower. I had no idea what to do, but I figured that it was simple enough: just take the razor and slide it up your leg! I grabbed the old, plastic, two-bladed, semi-rusty, man-razor from off the shower shelf. I placed it firmly in the middle of my shin and with great force, pulled the razor upward. Shocked, I saw a stream of blood oozing from the inch-long wound I had just inflicted. Luckily I realized after that that I needed to go a lot softer on my legs. When people asked what happened to my leg I would say, "the razor fell on my leg while I was taking a shower."

Then, apparrently not learning from my shaving mishap, and wanted to not have "caterpillars" above my eyes, I asked my mom if I could pluck my eyebrows. Again, she said, "sure," so I marched into the bathroom once again and grabbed the (also rusty) tweezers. Carefully I plucked out hair after hair in a pain-filled haze. Eventually I was satisfied and stopped. I suppose I liked the way my brows were shaped because I kept doing them like that. They were bad. They were so bad. My idea of a good brow job was to pull half of my eyebrows out from the unibrow inward. I looked real weird. And even with half of my eyebrows yanked out, I wasn't very good about keeping them plucked (I'm still not...).

I still loved the ponytail in sixth grade. I had learned that I should take a shower every day, so I did. My hair would go right from sopping wet, to ponytail every single day. Eventually some of the girls in my class informed me (in what was probably an intervention of sorts) that I would grow mold on my head if I kept doing that every day. That terrified me, so I started leaving it down to dry before putting it into a ponytail.

Seventh-eighth grade: I got better at shaving for the most part and I even started applying mascara. Occassionally I would toy around with my mom's blush and pressed powder. I really didn't learn how to apply makeup properly until rather recently...oh well! No one ever said it looked bad, so maybe it wasn't. As far as hair goes during this time, I had two styles, air-dryed left down, and up in a ponytail. I never did my nails. I just kept them short so that I could play the violin.

Freshman year: Not much changed. My eyebrows somehow got worse, though. Bigger and badder. But I don't remember doing anything different, they just morphed that way.

Also, I thought I was making a super cute face. Hahahaha!

Sophomore year: This was a pretty good year beauty-wise! I used eyeliner respectfully and mascara. I didn't do much else, but it was okay because my skin was pretty good. My hair fell exactly how I wanted it to without doing much to it!

Junior year: Something possessed me to tweeze the heck out of my eyebrows until they were super skinny lines. I learned how to use real liquid foundation and eye shadow! I got some really bad, thick bangs. They were nasty. My face shape does not allow blunt bangs to look good on me. As much as I envisioned myself looking like Anne Hathaway in The Devil Wears Prada, I looked more like the "perfect human" from the more recent Miike Snow music videos.

Senior year: One time during the winter I grew my eyebrows out super thick. That was kind of gross. Otherwise, it wasn't too bad.

Freshman year of college: Most of the time my hair and makeup was okay. I painted my nails quite a bit. But I did go through a phase where I thought I might look good if I parted my hair right down the middle and styled it stick straight, but with curls at the end. Maybe I forgot that this didn't work for me before. My face comes to a point right at my nose so having the part down the middle makes me really pointy!

Last year to now: I apply makeup about half of the time. I rarely do my hair. I'm still rocking the air-dryed look simply because I just don't like to spend all the time it takes to really do something with my hair. Most of the time I get my makeup right!

So that's the history of my beauty disasters and occassional triumphs (if you want to see pictures of examples of me with bad eyebrows and hair, I'll put them up. But only if you want me to. They're bad). Now I have to tell you a particularly unfortunate story that just happened to me last week.

I bought dry shampoo! I've never had dry shampoo, so naturally I didn't know how to use it. So the first morning I tried it, I didn't really put enough on, so my hair was still greasy-nasty. The next morning I wouldn't be fooled. I sprayed that stuff on like a Pinterest crafter gone crazy with gold spray paint. Finally feeling that I had sprayed enough on to tame the grease, I brushed out my hair like the can told me. I looked in the mirror expectantly and found that I looked like an old lady! My hair was white! Frantically, I tried to brush it out and coax it into my tresses, but it wouldn't be contained. I had to go to a dentist appointment and unfortunately I still looked pretty old. But now I know, guys. Now I know.

Dear girls and women everywhere who know how to do these things correctly,

Were you just born with this knowledge? Did you have a bunch of sisters? Or maybe your mom knew a lot about it and imparted the knowledge of cosmetics and hair to you? Maybe I spent so much time trying to fit in with my brothers that I guess I just never noticed that much about beauty and therefore was blissfully unaware that I was breaking so many beauty no-no's (nos? nose?). Perhaps your skin is just nice and your hair is just beautiful and you didn't really do anything. Maybe one day I'll learn your trade. But honestly, probably not because even though I can see that I need some help, I just really don't care quite enough to do anything about it. Besides, my husband thinks I'm pretty, so there! :P Eat it, you beauties!

Sincerely,
Still clueless

Mormon General Conference!

In case you didn't know already, I am a Mormon, or member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

Tomorrow and Sunday we have the wonderful chance to hear from a living prophet of God and his apostles! We call this meeting General Conference. It takes place every six months in Salt Lake City, Utah, but it is broadcast live worldwide on television, radio, and internet. After it is broadcast, it becomes available in print and is always available for viewing online.

At 10:00 A.M. MDT, the first session begins and lasts for two hours. There are five total sessions.

I love General Conference. I look forward to hearing the inspired talks given. The people who speak spend a very long time preparing for General Conference. A lot of thought and prayer goes into it.

When I listen to General Conference, I can feel the Holy Ghost touch my heart, telling me that what I'm hearing is true. I invite each of you to join me in watching this wonderful broadcast so that you can feel what I feel.



You can watch General Conference by clicking here.

Indian Tacos Recipe

Indian tacos (also known as Navajo tacos or Native American tacos) are a must if you ever visit the Pendleton Round-Up. Of course fry bread (the base of Indian tacos) with some honey or jam is delicious, too. The people who set up stands at Roy Raley park next to the Round-Up grounds have been making fry bread for a long time and their recipes are tried and true.

Naturally, I love fry bread, so I wanted to find a recipe that I liked as much as the fry bread from my home town. There are so many variations of the recipe, and they're all very similar, but sometimes a little tweak here or there can make all the difference in the texture. Isn't baking cool? I found one that's almost as, if not as good as the Round-Up staple.

So first, let's start off with the recipe for the fry bread. I got the recipe from this website and tweaked the amount of salt: 

Ingredients:

• Oil for frying (around two cups)
• 4 cups all-purpose flour
• 3 tablespoons baking powder
• 1 teaspoon salt (the recipe called for 2 TABLESPOONS!!!)
• 2 1/2 cups warm milk (more or less)

First mix your dry ingredients together in a large bowl. If you have a sifter, sift them. If not, use an egg beater. Warm up your milk (I used a microwave) to a bit hotter than body temperature and stir it into the dry ingredients bit by bit until your dough comes together. If it gets too sticky, add a little flour. Then cover your bowl with a towel and let it rise for about 15 minutes.

While your dough is resting, heat up your oil. You'll know your oil is ready if you splash a little bit of water into it and it sizzles. But don't go too hot or you'll burn your fry bread! If you're not sure, test a small amount of dough. It should brown fairly quickly (about a minute, maybe two). Then adjust the heat as necessary. 

When your dough is finished rising, tear off a small chunk and roll it into a ball and then flatten it out with your hands. It should look something like this:

The size of each piece of dough will depend on how big you want your fry bread to be. When I make Indian tacos, I make them a bit bigger than when I make fry bread just for eating with honey or jam. 
Place your dough pieces gently into your oil. You don't want it to splash back at you! Don't crowd your pan. Put two if they will fit, more if they are small, but try not to overlap each piece. 
With tongs, flip each piece so that both sides are a nice golden brown. When this color is achieved, place the hot fry bread onto a plate or bowl with a paper towel covering the bottom to catch the grease.

If you are making Indian tacos, prepare your taco meat. I used hamburger and those nice cop-out taco seasoning packages you find at the grocery store. I also had these toppings: 

• diced tomatoes 
• shredded lettuce
• chopped onions
• sour cream
• taco sauce (we also had salsa) 
• canned black beans (drained) 
• shredded cheese 

Once everything is ready to go, top your fry bread with any or all of the taco toppings and enjoy!

The Indian tacos I've had at the Round-Up have some kind of chili instead of seasoned ground beef, but I personally find the seasoned ground beef to be just as good.

Honeymoon Part B

Once upon a time on our honeymoon part A, I got sick and we ran out of money so we had to go home early. So we decided to do a honeymoon Part B almost 8 months after the fact. Here are some pictures about it.

Here's us on the way to the Oregon coast! We drove in our little 91 Geo Metro all the way there. FYI, it has no air conditioning. So we were sweating like banshees the whole time.

This is me at some pretty waterfall by Multnomah Falls. Maybe it's Horseshoe Falls?

Have you ever noticed how beautiful leaves look when the sun is shining through them? It's one of my favorite things. (Along with raindrops on roses, and whiskers on kittens, bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens...)

Multnomah Falls! This was Matt's first time seeing it! There are no pictures of us once we got to the coast because we were so tired from sweating all day. Once we got to the hotel, we basically just went to sleep.

But don't worry! The next day we saw some cool things! Like these cute Sea Lions at the Newport bay. My favorite part is when they push each other off the docks and yell at each other.

Oh look! My face is being squished by a kiss! Also, meet my favorite sweater. I found it at D.I. and I wear it all. the. time.

This is Matt's cutest face! Awwww...

We had a fun time at the beach. It was really foggy the whole time we were there.

We got up really early one morning to look at some tide pools! This is Devil's Punch Bowl!

So I always like to touch the creatures in the tide pools, right? You know, like feeling the anemone tentacles stick to your finger and stuff like that. Matt would NOT touch anything. He kept saying, "No! It's full of pus!"

I believe this is a Heron! It's probably just getting some breakfast or something. Also, I think those orange spots on the rocks are sea stars.

Then we went to the Oregon Coast Aquarium. My favorite part is going in the tunnels with the fish and the sharks! Matt's not so sure about it...



You know you can't go to the aquarium without getting one of these pictures...we obviously couldn't resist.

We went to Siletz Bay on the edge of Lincoln City. This is a pile of harbor seals. Just loungin'.

Foggy, but beautiful day. I took a bunch more pictures, but not all of them looked good. So this is all you get to see. We also got to see my brother, his daughter, and her mom! My niece is one and she's as cute as can be! I was glad to see her and her mom one last time before they moved to the east coast. I also got to see my brother and his kids from Utah! And of course the fam that lives in Pendleton/Athena. 

CWI vs. BYU

Hello! It's been a very long time since I've posted anything. So I just started school again, right? I used to go to BYU in Provo, but now I'm going to College of Western Idaho in...Nampa. Nampa is kind of the bum-hole of the Boise area, in my opinion. Some parts are okay, but other parts are kind of creepy and weird. I would find a picture for you, but nothing can do it justice. So let's set aside the fact that Nampa is weird and talk about CWI vs. BYU.



So here's BYU. It's beautiful, and it's large. There's lots of pictures you can look up about it, so I'll let you do that if you really don't know what it looks like already.



In BYU, you get some classes of this size. But in CWI...



...it really looks a lot more like this. Except maybe not so enthusiastic.



Here is one of the few buildings we have.

Sometimes I feel like this at CWI:



But at BYU, I felt more like this:



And during tests:



(P.S: Please watch Good Burger if you haven't. It's one of the finer pieces of film literature.)

So anyways, yeah, both schools have different pros and cons. For me, CWI is great right now. It's cheap and it's close and I can become a nurse quickly and then work my way up the nursing ladder. Parfait! Also, I like have smaller class sizes! The professors actually care about me so I don't feel like I'm drowning in anonymity.

Another thing that's contributing to my liking school better now is that my study habits have changed. After a year at BYU of just trying to scrape by doing the minimum amount of work, I've decided that I'd like to really gain something from my education. What's the point of spending all of this time and money just for a piece of paper that says I'm educated without any knowledge to back it up? So I'm working hard! And so far it's paying off.

How I Started Dating Matt, My Fiancé.

The Story According to Me:

Once upon a time, I moved to Boise during the summer to get a change in pace and hopefully get to a better place in my life. While there, I happened to meet Matt. I met him through a couple of mutual friends, Cherilyn and Kara. At one family home evening activity in my new ward, I saw Cherilyn (whom I had made friends with the previous day at church) and decided to stick with her in an attempt to integrate myself into the ward. She quickly introduced me to her friend, Kara, who then interrogated me about my level of knowledge and interest in things such as Phantom of the Opera, a Very Potter Musical, Harry Potter, and other similar things. During this entertaining conversation, she introduced me to Matt (who was standing with some friends across the gym) four times. Each time she yelled to him from across the gym, and each time he appeared more and more irritated. Kara and Cherilyn informed me that Matt was a very good friend of theirs, and that they hung out all the time. After the activity was over, I wanted to keep hanging out with Kara and Cherilyn, so I suggested we watch a movie. We all went to Hastings together and got "The Woman In Black." Then we went to Kara's house and we were just about to start the movie when we heard a knock at the door. And guess who it was? Matt.

He said that he had just left FHE and he decided to drive by Kara's house to see if we happened to be there, and we were. So we invited him to watch the movie with us. I thought it was a little odd that he would just drive by and invite himself over. But oh well, I was glad to be making another friend! For some reason, I just kind of assumed that he had just graduated from high school. (Matt kind of has a baby face! It's so cute!) So we watched the movie, which was TERRIFYING, and talked for a while before we all went home. Mostly it was just Matt and Kara talking and sharing some stories and what-not. I felt kind of like I was eve's dropping on their lives, but I was definitely invited to be there. After the night was over, I was glad that I was finally embarking on my quest to make new friends.

The following Sunday, I was sitting in church in the very back row by a guy I didn't know. I was just sitting there when I looked over at the door and saw Matt! I smiled at him and looked back at the speaker. When I looked up again, he was standing at my pew, asking me if he could sit by me. I said yes and we started singing a hymn. I was really impressed by his singing voice. It was absolutely beautiful.

I was at another friend's house after church and my phone rang. It was an unknown Idaho number. I answered it and it was Matt. He wanted to know if I would sing in the Institute choir that his parents direct. I agreed!

Later that week I went to choir and was absolutely astonished at Matt's voice. He was singing a solo and he sounded like an angel. It took a lot of will-power not to stare at him too much. I talked to Matt a little bit afterwards and some of the other choir members invited him to watch Star Wars at their house. He invited me to come along. I rode in his car and became more and more impressed with him. He was absolutely hilarious! And it was so easy for the two of us to engage in conversation. The entire night, I wanted to be better friends with Matt. He was seriously so cool. Unfortunately during the movie, I didn't get to sit by him. I was rather annoyed, actually. After the movie, he drove me back to where I was parked and I drove home. Things were really starting to look up! I was sure that I had found a friend that I wanted to hang out with!

On Saturday, I went home to Pendleton for my sister's graduation (Cindy). On the way to Pendleton, I got a text from Matt inviting me to go to another friend's house to watch a movie. I told him that I wished I could, but I was in Pendleton. Later that night, he texted me and we texted for about a half hour. During that time we talked about how much we liked star-gazing and how small you feel when you're thinking about the universe.

I came home on Sunday afternoon and I went to church in Jane's family ward. Matt texted me later to ask where I was and I told him I went to Jane's ward because we didn't get back in time for the Single's ward church meetings. We texted back and forth and then my phone started ringing and it was him. I was amused that he was calling me. He told me he was tired of texting and he just wanted to talk in real life. We ended up talking until 12:30 that night. The more I was getting to know him, the cooler I thought he was. I could tell that this guy had depth of character and the ability to laugh and have a great time.

On the phone we had agreed that I would pick him up for FHE and then we would watch a movie afterwards. So we went to a service project and then to a barbeque and then back to his house to watch "Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close." After the movie we talked until 2:45 in the morning. I felt like I could tell him almost anything and I was glad that he seemed to be telling me a lot about himself, too. I'm pretty sure that on the way home that night I couldn't stop smiling.

On Tuesday, I went to a waterpark with my niece and nephew and one of their friends. It was freezing and I was exhausted and wind-burned by the end. Matt had invited me to go with him to stain his grandparent's fence with him, but I was at the waterpark all day. After I got home, I started mowing the lawn and Matt called me. He wanted me to go downtown with him to "freak alley." I thought that he wanted to meet some friends and he was just inviting me along. He came to pick me up and it turned out it was just the two of us. I was EXHAUSTED. And smelly. And sunburned and wind-burned. I was getting discouraged because I felt like I was being pretty rude and interruptive the entire night. I was so embarrassed that after he dropped me off, I apologized for my behavior. He didn't know what I was talking about, so it was all good.

Although I had been having a great time with Matt over the last few days, I didn't let myself really like him because he kept making it clear that he gets annoyed when girls like him and he just wants to hang out and go on casual dates. I took that as a huge hint that he didn't want me to get my hopes up for anything other than just friendship unless otherwise notified.

Wednesday was another choir rehearsal and afterwards, Matt tried to set me up with his friend, Tyler. I felt a little awkward about it, since I didn't know Tyler at all and Matt kind of put us on the spot! But we agreed to go out on Friday. Then Matt invited Tyler and I over to his house to watch "The Man Who Knew Too Little." I love that movie and I was having a great time! I realized that I was starting to feel some level of interest for Matt, but I defnitely didn't want to make him think I was another girl who liked him without merit. I went home that night and got ready for bed.

As I was lying in bed, my phone rang and it was Matt, once again. He told me that he was calling because we had hung out for three consecutive nights and he didn't want me to think I was getting any undue attention. Basically, to me it sounded like he was telling me that I really shouldn't be getting any ideas about the two of us being together. He contintued to talk to me and he kept talking about how sometimes there are moments in life that have the potential to change our lives if we act on them. I agreed, and thought nothing more of the conversation than a good discussion between friends. However, after a couple of hours, he finally said, "like for example, if I went the entire summer without telling you that I like you, that would be a shame." I was silent on the other end, quickly trying to sort out if he was being hypothetical, or if he really did like me. I didn't want to say anything until I figured it out because I didn't want to embarrass myself. I finally said, "Wait, was that just an example?" He said that it wasn't. I kept saying dumb things like, "Oh, wow. Wow. Good to know. Good to know." I think I was saying that to assess how I felt about the whole situation. I determined that I liked him back, so I tried to tell him I liked him back by saying, "Well, I really enjoy spending time with you. I think you are a really cool person and a good friend." He paused and responded with, "So...if I understand you correctly...you like hanging out and being my friend, but we're nothing more than friends?" Then I realized my mistake and said, "Ugh, see...this is the part where I'm socially awkward and I forgot to tell you that I like you back."The rest of the conversation was kind of bewildered and slightly awkward. But good, still good.

On Thursday we watched another movie at Matt's house, this time with his friend, David. I sat by Matt, of course, and soon we were holding hands. Too bad our hands were all sweaty...

On Friday, I invited Matt to come with me and my family to Eagle Island to swim in the river and have a picnic. He agreed and we had a blast! After that, we went for a drive and to Dairy Queen and then decided to go star-gazing. That night, he asked if I would be his girlfriend and I told him I would.

 It's pretty extraordinary for me to move so fast in a relationship. Historically, I am friends with a person for a loooooonnnggg time and then finally decide that I like them. But for some reason, I was okay with being in a relationship with Matt so soon. It just felt like everything was going to be okay. It felt right.


The Story According to Matt:

Having come back from my mission to a singles ward that I soon found to be less than overstocked with girls I personally found interesting, and after months of dates, blind and otherwise, I had all but given up on dating in  Boise and was intent upon finding a girl in Rexburg, where I was planning to attend school.  I had several friends that were girls (most of whom I had either dated, or had had brief and intermittent mutual interest in), and made that my main source of social interaction.  This was a good choice, I later learned.

On one particular Monday night, two of my friends--Kara (who I had previously dated on a semi-serious basis) and Ty (who I had met only the night before at a mutual friend, Craig's, house for games)--texted me again and again, inviting me to come to ward FHE, something I had done perhaps only twice in the eight months I'd been home from my mission.  More than halfway through the activity, I finally relented and showed up after the promised ice cream had been served (and depleted).  Another friend of mine, Nathan, had returned from his mission only five days prior, and we stood for essentially the entirety of my time at FHE that night talking and catching up, along with our friend Jason.  Kara approached me soon after I arrived, with Cherilyn and another girl (who I had seen sitting with Cherilyn the day before during sacrament meeting and who I had assumed was Cherilyn's cousin, which association immediately cooled any interest I might have otherwise had), who they introduced me to, but whose name I promptly forgot.  They returned to their place across the gym and I continued my conversation with Jason and Nathan.  A few minutes later, Kara called me over to tell me that the girl--Emma--had seen "Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog" (something Kara and I had watched together some months before while we were dating), and then had me confirm to this new girl Emma that "A Very Potter Musical" was, in fact, hilarious.  I then resumed my conversation with Jason and Nathan.  Fifteen minutes later (whether it was actually fifteen minutes or not is lost to my memory, and fifteen is the baseless estimate I give in each retelling of this part of my first real encounter with Emma), I heard from across the gym, "That's my friend, Matt Knight!"  I turned to see Kara waving and, now slightly annoyed, waved back.

Soon, Kara approached me again, not to introduce me once again to this girl (whose name I still didn't know), but to ask if I was going to Applebee's for karaoke.  I said that no, I wasn't, and they left, walking back across the gym and through the door.  Thinking they were gone, I was surprised when they walked through the door I was standing next to with Nathan and Jason, and annoyed again when Kara said, "This is my friend Matt Knight!"  I waved again and gave an obligatory hello, and they left.  Soon thereafter, Nathan decided it was time for him to go home, and I opted to follow suit.  However, not wanting to go home and unable to reach Kara and Cherilyn, I stopped by Kara's house just in case they hadn't gone to Applebee's.  They hadn't.  We watched "Woman in Black" and then talked until almost 1 am.  I added Emma on Facebook, but didn't make any effort to contact her during the following week.

Sunday came, and I was late to church.  None of the people I normally sat with were there, I found out, and as I walked into the chapel after the Sacrament was passed, I saw that the chapel was completely full, with people standing in the back of the room listening.  There was one seat in all I could see, in the very back row on the far side of the room, and it happened to be next to Emma.  Thinking that I sort of knew her, having met and talked a bit the week before, I sat next to her.  During the congregational hymn halfway through the meeting, she complimented me on my voice and thereby unwittingly stroked my ego.  I got her number from Cherilyn that evening and called her to invite her to join the Nampa Institute Choir.  She obliged.

The next Wednesday she came to choir for the first time.  At the end of the rehearsal, I found her sitting by herself in the foyer and invited her to go with me down to the Institute side of the building for sundaes.  We ended up going to Diana's house for a movie, and I was disappointed when Jessica sat next to me, stealing Emma's intended seat.  I drove Emma to and from the movie, and we had some time on each ride to talk and get to know each other.  To my delight, I discovered her to be a smart, funny girl who enjoyed my own sense of humor and had excellent taste in music.  I began to find myself being interested in her.

I didn't talk to her again until that weekend.  Since she went with her sister to visit her family in Pendleton, she wasn't at Saturday morning rehearsal, and though she had told me that she would miss rehearsal the day before, I feigned forgetfulness and texted her to invite her to watch a movie with a few friends and myself.  The movie didn't happen, but it gave me an excuse to keep texting her.  Later that night I called her, and we talked until late into the night, as well as the following (Sunday) night.  Monday, we went to an FHE activity together and then returned to my house to watch "Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close", and then talked together until almost 3 a.m.  By this point, I knew I liked her, but I was afraid of getting hurt, so I intended to just be friends with her.  The next night we went downtown, and the night after that (Wednesday) we watched "The Man Who Knew Too Little" with my friend Tyler (whom I had actually set Emma up on a date with earlier that evening).  Emma and I once again spoke on the phone for hours into the night.  I had intended to send her a text message indicating that I wanted to respect the line between appropriate attention and unwanted attention that is sometimes otherwise difficult to identify in friendships between men and women, but as it began to become lengthy, I instead called her.  Two hours later, and after a long conversation about hating hints (which was actually one giant hint on my part, hoping she would let me know if she felt about me the way I felt for her), I finally expressed to her my feelings.  Her response was stunned silence and then something nearly akin to putting me in the friend zone.  I was crushed.  Then she clarified, saying that she did, in fact, like me, but that she didn't have the guts to say so.  I was ecstatic.

The next evening, Thursday, while we watched "Time Bandits" with my friend David, Emma and I held hands for the first time.  Friday, the night after that, we offically began dating and shared our first kiss as we stargazed.

Prelude to Summer

"Home"

This particular period in my life is strange. For me, it's as though nowhere is really "home." Of course, I know I can always go home to Pendleton and it will be "home" as in the place I grew up and "home" as in the place where my parents live and the place I love. The odd thing is that it doesn't feel like the place I belong anymore. But it's not like I feel like I belong anywhere else. School isn't home and Meridian isn't home even though I feel comfortable here. I suppose this is what it's supposed to feel like for a little while, after all, this is a transition period in my life. This is the space between growing up and starting my own family.

New Adventures in Meridian

People here are friendly. I'm pleased to say that I've made quite a few friends already! It seems as though there are lots of things to do here. So many places to go and people to meet. Meeting people is kind of a unique experience. There is so much to learn about them. How are you supposed to know if who they seem to be is who they actually are? I guess that's one thing only time can really tell. I have also been reminded at how terrible I am with learning names. Oh well I guess. I'm trying to get a feel for what it's going to be like this summer. At this point it's hard to know, but I have a feeling it's going to be really fun. 

On the Other Hand: Finding a Job in Meridian

Eternal job application filling-out. Oh man it's so tedious. Who knew finding a job here would be so difficult. I certainly didn't anticipate the economy to stink so much here. There are so many businesses! I filled out a bunch of apps and am still going to fill out a bunch more. I really hope I can find a job soon. Otherwise I might not go back to school in the fall.